Here's a toast to learning to accept ourselves for who we are! I sure have not kept up the promise that I made to myself to keep doing this blog once I started it back up again. I thought maybe it had been a few months, TOPS...but not SIX. Where does all the time go? Well, I can tell you, after that wild thesis writing nightmare and pressing the send button on my thesis proposal as my last few blogs reference, I DID get my life back at least for the summer...and it was GLORIOUS!
I played and relaxed all summer and it was heaven. I made wonderful day long excursions to the beach with my dog and a few lovely snacks, drinks and books to while away my time without worrying about homework or the demands of anything. I had the whole days of those beautiful weekends to just do nothing but enjoy life. It was so freeing to have that bliss after almost seven years of graduate school. I enjoyed myself so much that part of me did not even want to go back to my classes in the fall, but here I am back at it.
Now the crispness of fall is beginning to set in, I am behind on homework and frustrated with how it is going this semester, and longing again for the freedom that I had this last summer. I look back longingly and realize that I was healthier (more time for the gym), more rested (no late night homework sessions), less grumpy (also do to late night homework sessions), and just overall I felt more centered and in tune with my life (due to not dealing with all the deadlines and general hoops that going through grad school requires). It is times like these that I try and reflect back on my opening sentence. Learning to say a toast to learning to accept myself fully.
Yes, I am a grumpy, disgruntled, frustrated and sleepy student right now in my second master's degree program, but I have to remind myself what it is all for. Sometimes that is a daily reminder, sometimes it is hourly and even some days...I have to get out the stopwatch to accurately watch the "seconds". I tell myself "someday I will be an art therapist" and smile. I think of Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz and silently sing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow..." and hope that the Wicked Witch of the West does not get the best of me before this adventure is over!
Blessings and Love,
D.
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